I find myself constantly jotting notes on index cards and scraps of paper. Sometimes they sit in my Bible for weeks and I come back to them to meditate on my original interest or expand my thinking as the Holy Spirit reveals more to me about why He drew me to these words. Today I'd like to share some one liners and questions that have found their way onto my radar screen. Perhaps the Holy Spirit will use them to touch you in some way or draw out your thinking to unveil something in your heart. So often I find myself explaining why I loved a scripture or thought, hoping it will minister life to someone. I am impressed today that the Holy Spirit was sent to do this in and for us. I invite you to allow Him to do what He does best--reveal Christ's finished work and God's love to each of us when we allow Him access. I would love to have your feedback on which, if any, of these touched you in some way. My email is robin.lys@hotmail.com .


"Either sin is with you, lying on your shoulders, or it is lying on Christ, the Lamb of God, 'Now if it is lying on your back; you are lost; but if it is resting on Christ, you are free, and you will be saved. Now choose what you want."

"Sin is not cancelled by lawful living."
(Both of these are from Martin Luther)

"He found me on my walk of shame."

"No one tells you that the shields you carry to keep you safe, they become the steel cages that keep you alone."

"Truth--I thought an open door made it too easy for someone to shoot an arrow through my hard and quaking heart."

"Why do I allow the past to rob me of the present possibility?"

"Why don't I se the price of being safe is the cost of being solitary?"

"Why haven't I seen that distrust can destroy a life?"

"Why do I have trouble being patient with friendship... listening long?"

"Do people find themselves waiting to hear my flight?"

"The dark's never bothered me much.
Its women who have scared me.
Women can haunt with shadows of their own."

"No one wants anything of anyone but to be honest and real and trust enough to take off the mask."

"In a refuge of grace, who has anything to prove or protect... anything to hide."

"In the space of grace--who needs to live for something when they can live with someone."

"When we breathe in grace, we finally believe we can be real--and be changed into the realest versions of Holy Grace Himself."

"If you don't know what He looks like, then you cannot do the one thing He has called you to do: LOVE"

"Falling away is when you walk out on the only thing that can set you free."

And finally I'd like to add this song... Embracing Accusations by Shane and Shane...

Face to Face

The last several weeks I've been going through a new season in my life. Cleaning, purging, moving and removing are some of the words that might describe the activities that have filled my days. I mentioned to a friend recently my distaste or could I even be so bold as to suggest 'fear' of change as I embarked on several of the tasks I have completed. The satisfaction following the completion of some very physical activities has also given me a new perspective on some very real struggles in my life such as goal setting, motivation and even going deeper, thoughts about my identity and how I do relationships.

Recently, with the help of a friend, I undertook the task of pressure washing and staining my deck and rocking chairs. A few days later we tackled the porch furniture which had a dull and quite weathered appearance after ten years of sun, wind and rain. For some time now, I'd had no real motivation to do outside projects as I daily confronted the more apparent needs inside. The most pressing needs of vacuuming, cleaning and laundry also took precedent over the many desires I have had to reorganize and purge drawers and closets of items no longer necessary or meaningful in my life. The staining and painting were like a facelift for my personal property but the experience itself was more of a facelift for my spirit. Learning how much I enjoy physical tasks and being outdoors was like finding a part of myself tucked away in the corner of an uncleaned closet or unkempt desk drawer.



The internal boost I received has given me a new found interest in discovering more of what makes me tick or just what sort of person God had in mind for me to be. It also gave me the incentive to continue on this path of change as I moved my efforts inside. The room where I once used my computer for research and writing had become a place I rarely visited. Some of this took place when I purchased a new laptop and acquired a wireless connection with the ability to connect anytime, anywhere. For quite some time now, I've found myself at the kitchen table when using my computer. Since the deep connection I felt between my prayer life and writing were somehow broken, I found it difficult to find the motivation for writing and other pleasureable activities that God has shown me are a part of my core identity.



In many ways I was also trying to escape the harsh and judgmental words from someone in my past. “Are you going to go back in your sanctuary again?” Taking these words into my heart without examining the damage they 'd done made me question my identity and fear relationship with others in a way I'd never imagined. After retiring from teaching, the discovery of my love for solitude, writing and my family history seemed so natural. The cruelty with which this part of my identity was attacked left me feeling the old emotions of my childhood...”something must be really wrong with you at the core... you are wrong, incomplete, unsatisfactory....” The death of my “all in one printer” seemed to be the last straw, making it almost impossible for me to find the motivation to continue on my journey to the dreams and desires God has planted in my heart. I just couldn't seem to climb out of the dismal pit of discouragement and make the changes necessary to revitalize my dreams of writing.



Tossing the printer into the garbage was not an easy decision for me to make. I am indebted to a friend, who helped me investigate the problems and realize it was time for a new printer. In just a couple of weeks, this same friend gifted me with another “all in one” printer, giving me the ability to return to activities that bring joy to my life. Now, I can return to writing in a comfortable space and have the tools I need close at hand. My task is not yet complete in this room but today I am sitting with sunlight from the window pouring over my shoulder and feel a lightness in my spirit and a new sense of direction. As I look over the other shoulder I see a closet purged of the unnecessary and remember the ambivalence and inner struggle of emptying two file cabinets filled with documents and information from a past season of life. Getting unstuck from a former season and letting go of the old to grab hold of the new can be a grueling process. In retrospect, I can now say with confidence it was in taking the first steps to remove and purge I found the ability to trust it was the right course of action.



Motivation to change and move forward must come from within. For many of us the well of motivation needs to be primed. Some heartbreak or failure has led us to a place of what seems to be a real drought in our spirit. Healing from the inside out is largely done in private with God as our Counselor and motivator. He knows our hearts and sees every obstruction limiting and preventing the release of His gifts in our lives. However, He knows our need for relationship and connection to those who will get down in the muck and mud with us and wrestle with the demons that have kept us frozen in time.

It is this kind of relationship I would like to celebrate in my writing today.



As I observed a writing lesson at an elementary school last week, I was reminded of the analogy of deposits and withdrawals. While the instructor was using these terms to indicate ways of finding topics for writing, my mind drifted to relationships. Some relationships seem to largely involve withdrawals, while God in His goodness brings others into our lives to deposit into our accounts.



We are all aware of the work necessary to deposit large sums of money into a bank account. It is much the same in relationships. When individuals who have been wounded or broken by painful life circumstances (and that includes ALL of us), we can find ourselves stranded in the pain as if we were left on a highway in the dark with no way home. The light necessary for finding our way may be coming around the curve in a relationship with another individual with their own file cabinet filled with failures and painful memories. Purging the pain in relationship requires that both individuals roll up their sleeves and get down and dirty in the process of change. I love the effects of a pressure washer as it seems to miraculously remove the dirt, grime, mold and mildew, leaving a clean surface with which to work. It gives such a feeling of satisfaction to see the new nature of the wood, wall or walkway. Sometimes we are called to feel the sting of pressure another is facing in their lives which can become a pruning of both hearts if each individual will look deep as if in a mirror to see God's purpose in relationship.



On my desk in front of me, my eyes go to a picture of my grandson and granddaughter, nose to nose, arms about each other in an embrace as if they were giving each other an Eskimo kiss. Their eyes are crinkled, lips smiling and joy is apparent on their faces. This photo screams of intimacy in relationship, with no division and hindrances as they look at one another face to face accepting one another fully.





Yesterday while working on a project with my granddaughter that involved the use of my new printer, she took her place by my side. She touched the photo of she and her brother affectionately and said, “I love this picture!” How uncanny that she would draw attention to this particular picture on the same day my eyes had found inspiration from the same photo.



Suddenly, my mind went to another picture of the two of them in the back seat on the way home from school. Listening in on a disagreement they were having, I adjusted my rear view mirror just in time to see my granddaughter's eyes, not crinkled in love and joyful adoration but a look of frustration and painful displeasure as her brother begged to disagree with her on the subject at hand. I couldn't help but feel her disappointed resolution when she backed away from the fray and said something like, “well, I don't understand what you are saying...” and stared in another direction as if contemplating her surrender.



We cannot escape the painful withdrawals that come from relationship in this fallen world. We can, however, make choices to go face to face with our Creator and ask Him for help in getting unstuck from the effects of offenses in life and relationship. If we listen, He will speak to us through those around us to bring recognition of how and why we have found ourselves mired in discouragement or depression. There will be those he brings into our lives who will sharpen us and walk with us, making deposits instead of withdrawals and lighting the fire for change and motivation if we will open our hearts to the risk of being known by others. God does seem to work in mysterious ways to bring people into our lives. Like that grain of sand necessary to bring forth a beautiful pearl, they enter the comfort zone of our lives and give that little push we need to take that first step



I would be remiss if I failed to mention the fear of face to face interaction with others in the wake of difficult and failed relationships of the past. Sitting at my kitchen table scrolling for an hour or more through Facebook postings became my substitute for real face to face relationships for a time, simply because it seemed easier than doing the hard work of real and authentic relationship. Purging, cleaning and reorganizing my physical surroundings has been much easier than coming face to face with old thought patterns and file folders filled with wrong thoughts about my identity. This kind of change cannot be done in isolation. It requires others around us who are willing to give that little boost, the encouragement we need to get started.



There will be moments when what we experience feels like the Eskimo kiss of intimate encounters with others and other times we will want to surrender to the voice inside that says, “I just don't know what you are trying to do here, God... I don't know what you are talking about!” It's living in the tension of relationship we find healing and renewal in our lives.

As the day ended with my grandchildren, I heard their laughter coming from another room. I looked to see my grandson lifting my granddaughter and toting her around as she laughed out loud in the obvious joy of the moment.



The closet in my room is still incomplete in its reorganization and my garage is the next thing to be tackled. My lesson for today, however, seems clear. Motivation and change are more easily accomplished in the daily workings of relationship. These will have their ebb and flow and times of withdrawal and deposits. Taking the first step will require those face to face encounters with a God who wraps His arms around us and gently encourages us to trust Him even when we want to say, “I don't understand what you are saying.”



Today I am thankful for those who have stepped into my life with encouragement and gentle pushes inviting change in my life. I want to experience the joy of being carried by a brother or sister even if it means I must also experience painful times of misunderstanding and disillusionment. As I contemplate the revelation that came to me about the assault on my identity, I must admit that all relationships can be turned to His good in our lives if we remain committed to a face to face relationship with God and others.



Last week the writing instructor at school instructed the third graders to get “eye to eye and knee to knee” on the carpet to tell each other stories they heard or wanted to write about. This seems a perfect picture for me of a face to face relationship encouraging one another to continue living out our stories and committing ourselves to intimate relationship no matter how uncomfortable it might become. Our stories get messy and sometimes we seem to reach an impasse in the plot. We can make deposits in others' lives and motivate one another to be all they were meant to be if we commit to take a step forward and get eye to eye and face to face with another who has gotten stuck. Stories are filled with surprises as I've recently learned in my purging, cleaning and reorganizing experience. I can't help but wonder... “What are you doing God? And … What is waiting for me out in the garage?”

Embracing the Seasons

“So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life---your sleeping, eating, going to work, and walking-around life---and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well---adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.” (Romans 12:1-2)



Some days my life feels very ordinary. Since my retirement from teaching ten years ago, I've settled into a pace of life that I'm sure would seem quite peculiar to those in the working world. When I felt God call me to retire early to go back to school, I envisioned a new position, new horizons and new challenges. I did not, however, envision days of solitude and a walking-around the house doing ordinary, run of the mill kinds of activities. Certainly, a life centered in prayer and quiet days of solitude would not have been at the top of my choices for the future. After all, I've always been a people person and love interaction with others.



From days in a classroom filled with the noisy activity of five year olds to days of quiet reflection with only the sounds of my AC, frig and an occasional trash truck or lawnmower has been quite an adjustment. Ten years and how swiftly they have passed. It's been a journey, perhaps I could say its a bit like the one Abraham was invited to take... a journey to a land he did not know. Kindergarten, ordinary? There is absolutely nothing ordinary about any day filled with the life and vitality of young children. Gone are the days of switching gears every ten minutes due to their short attention spans. Instead, God is vying for my attention as I continually ask Him when is recess? When can I go outside with the others?



So how has God been teaching me to embrace what He has for me and learn how to fix my attention on Him? It's in the ordinariness of life He seems to speak with most clarity to my heart. Let me give you an example from this morning.



I'm showering and getting cleaned up for my day. While drying my hair, I realize the new deodorant I'd just purchased has a wonderful scent. Immediately, I thought of the treks I've taken to over a dozen dollar, drug and grocery stores looking for my old standby, my favorite scented deodorant. Of course, none can compare to this one so I spend weeks looking as I watch my favorite slowly dwindling away. I was surprised to find myself feeling angry as I “settled for” a new scent. What I'd come to accept as the best for me, the thing that pleased me most, was now unavailable.



Call this an object lesson or the quiet whisper of His voice, nonetheless, I knew He was speaking. I have been feeling as if I've had to “settle for” less. As the years have gone by I've felt less willing to accept this season as God's best for me. At times I've even felt anger and wrestled like Jacob for an identity change. How long will this identity crisis last? How in the world can I have any impact on the world if I'm not an active part of what is happening “out there?” Certainly I've seen answered prayers and touched lives along the way but when can I get back out there with the rest of the world? And by the way, don't you see my bank account? What am I going to do about that if I don't get a new career?



First, He reminded me He ordained this time for bringing healing to my life. This was a healing that needed to happen from the inside out. It's been a time when time constraints and deadlines were removed so there was plenty of time for soul searching and heart surgery. As I've opened my heart before Him in the quietness of my ordinary days, I've experienced His love in ways I'd never thought possible. Old mindsets, favored ways of living, my opinions, dreams and visions have been put to death on the altar.

Today I've been reminded some things no longer work for us and no matter how hard we search them out and try to make them fit, they just need to die.



In the Message translation it says we are to recognize what He wants from us. In verse17 it says,”We get what we say straight from God and say it as honestly as we can.” So here it is straight from the scent of the deodorant bottle to you, as clear as I heard it from Him. “Be content in the season in which you are living.” He wants my attention, my love and my heart.





The following verse came to mind as I placed my new scented deodorant back in the cabinet and tossed perhaps my last bottle of favorite scent into the trash can....





“But thanks be to God, Who in Christ always leads us to triumph and through us spreads and makes evident the fragrance of the knowledge of God everywhere.


For we are the sweet fragrance of Christ [which exhales] unto God, among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing.” (II Corinthians 2:14-15)



This message is not about the struggles of those who have retired from or no longer propelled daily into the culture of the working world. It is about all of our hearts and our propensity to believe the “grass is greener.” We are not so far removed from our brother and sister, Adam and Eve, in feeling God is holding out on us. Some of us are searching high and low (preaching to self here) for the things of the last season or the position we have chosen for self, when all He asks is that we readily recognize He knows the end from the beginning and everything in between. He wants what's best for us.



When we begin to recognize the season of life in which we are involved and quickly respond to what He is doing in us and for us, with thankfulness and gratitude, the fragrant scent of Christ within us can touch our culture for Christ. I ask myself, “Isn't that what we are called to do in every season of life?”



Thanking Him today for an ordinary day with an extraordinary lesson...



Letting go of the old, embracing the new, so that I can be that sweet fragrance when I go out into the world.






“Through us, he brings the knowledge of Christ. Everywhere we go, people breathe in the exquisite fragrance. Because of Christ, we give off a sweet scent rising to God....”

Ripples of Love

On Sunday the pastor spoke about skipping stones on water and the ripple effect of things in our lives. Both yesterday and this morning, I feel the ripples of something happening within my heart I'd like to express and hopefully send the ripples even further and on into the lives of others.

Almost the first thing I read this morning was the very REAL and heart rending account of something that touched the life of one of my dearest sisters in Christ. I immediately felt the ripple of pain as it touched something deep inside my heart. While the descriptions she used to relay the painful experiences of her life are quite personal and tell her individual story, I was made acutely aware how I have been similarly broken by the fallen world in which we find ourselves living. It was almost as if the words of her painful discovery were ripping my heart and I bled out of the same kind of wound from my past. One of the first questions I asked myself was "What should my response be to this wounding of my sister's heart?"

I only have to look back about twelve hours to find the answer. Just last evening, I found myself grabbing a boxed pizza from a man at Pizza Hut, eyes down and heading for the exit as quickly as possible to avoid the stares of those who might witness I was breaking down right before their eyes. A text just moments earlier read, "Can I call you now?" to which I replied a desperately typed, "Yes." By the time I found myself behind the steering wheel, there was a simultaneous opening of a floodgate of tears and the ring of my cellphone. God's perfect timing. His ripples of grace!

On the other end was a REAL friend going through REAL trauma in her own life. The 46 min and 01 second she sacrificed for me to allow God's love to ripple through her life into mine...I pray they are written down in God's book and she will find a great reward for sitting with me in a time of  REAL suffering. Having had similar experiences in life and knowing the brokenness that sometimes seem to overwhelm, she made herself available to listen and comfort. Words like, "I've been there and I understand"came long before words of scripture or calls to pray and seek God's answers. Her words came only after much listening and caring and compassionate questions about how I was feeling. 

When I finished reading the painfully REAL heart crushing experience of my friend this morning, there was a ripple effect immediately. I desired to be the one on the other end of the phone with solace and comfort for a sorrowful, hurting heart. If I had not found comfort from a friend last evening, certainly I might have found myself feeling more discouraged... seeing one more casualty of the enemy's attack on one more sister. However, God's love had rippled into and through my life so I might hear His heart concerning our calling to others who are experiencing painful circumstances.

The challenge for me as I write this is in being as open and honest with my struggles as this brave and courageous sister was this morning as she shared her current heartbreak. As I thought about it, I realized how deeply wounded many of us feel by those we have needed to "have our backs." It is only in relationships where I have felt another open up and authentically share their own personal struggle I've been willing to share my fears and failures. All others only see the mask and never come to know the REAL ME.

When I started this blog, I remember one night listening to Natalie Grant's song, REAL ME for over 2 hours. I listened to every Youtube composition of this song... some repeatedly. I wept and cried out to God to make me a REAL person, one others would find approachable. My heart's desire was that I would be like Jesus and be willing to sit with others in their painful emotions. I have failed miserably at times to follow through and other times have found it happened quite naturally. Today I have become aware again of my need to be REAL so that I can be Jesus for others. It really is like a ripple effect on the water when skipping stones. But unlike the boundaries of the bank of a river or pond, God's love and it's ripples of mercy and grace have no bounds.

So what does all this mean for me and you today? For me, God has opened my eyes to see how critical it is for me to be available to those who are hurting. He has also spoken to my heart about taking the mask off and sharing my real fears and failures. Obviously, there might be those who will judge my life and even laugh at my fears and failures. Having lived through and come out of an abusive relationship, I have sought to run as far as possible from the judgment and condemnation of others. Running has taken me out of the conflict for a time, but perhaps it has seriously affected my very REAL calling in life. The Bible says, "Jesus was numbered with the transgressors." This and other scriptures tells me He was friends with the broken and wounded.... those who "hadn't gotten it all right yet."

We are living in the fallen world and we are called to a ministry of reconciliation and redemption. In the book of James, we are called to confess our faults one to another that we might find healing.Unfortunately, for many of us, the idea of confessing our fears and failures only resurrects painful memories of those who were unavailable or unequipped to sit with us in our painful moments.Sometimes we have even experienced the judgment and condemnation of others. For many, like myself, it was at this point we grew to know the ever faithful love of Christ.However, this doesn't allow us to jump ship or run in fear to a place of anonymity in the body of Christ. In fact, it has been through this experiential knowledge of Christ's love that we have been called to also number ourselves with the broken and wounded,.

I would like to end with a few thoughts from the book Numbered with the Transgressors by Larry Jackson (purchased at the church where I heard the author speak... and also met the two sisters mentioned in this blog post. Coincidental? I think not... just more ripples of His love that began some years ago when He placed these sisters in my life that His love might continue to ripple through mine and theirs.)

From the book....
We jump from the "number of the transgressors, even in family situations when God wants to use us to minister salvation, healing and deliverance to family members.
Unfortunately, the modern church is not so willing to be found by the very people who need it the most.
The underlying root of "jumping from the number of the transgressors" is pride.

I ask myself today... What causes me to run or "jump," if you will, from being numbered with Jesus among the transgressors?
Would you ask yourself, how am I doing at being REAL with others?

Would you thank God for the ripple effects of His love in your life and show you where to skip the rock so His love can ripple out affecting others with His love for them?